


The Unreliability of Disney

by APuRpLePoPtArT



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-27
Updated: 2017-05-27
Packaged: 2018-11-05 15:24:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 494
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11016189
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/APuRpLePoPtArT/pseuds/APuRpLePoPtArT
Summary: Surely that child can't be the captain of the Jolly Roger





	The Unreliability of Disney

**Author's Note:**

> It's Saturday and I'm bored, which means I have too much free time and am contemplating the lives of fictional TV characters and thusly this fic about Captain Hook learning about Disney's portrayal of him as a bumbling pirate that is terrified of an actual crocodile... that is constantly outwitted by a child half the age of his stepson...

 “It’s downright insulting! And completely untrue! I would never take a hula hoop from a child nor would I wear my hair in such a fashion!”

Emma raised her eyebrow at her husband and barely contained a giggle.

 “And this Jake fellow hardly seems a capable captain he’s barely older than Henry!”

Killian’s hook waved wildly as he gesticulated his disgust.

“I will not allow my son to watch any more of this nonsense!”

 Emma remained silent as she walked across the living room to retrieve her son. William had been a welcome surprise not long after they had defeated the black fairy. Normally he tended to maintain the same calm demeanor as his older brother but for the past few days he had suffered from a painful ear infection and after being stuck at home with him for 2 days Emma had insisted that it was Killian’s turn to stay home with him. From this, she could only surmise that Killian had attempted to entertain their son by letting him watch Disney Junior and she could only guess that her husband had now been introduced to Captain Jake from Jake and the Neverland Pirates. She, however, had not expected to be accosted about the unreliability of Disney the second she walked through the door.

As she greeted her son and began making faces at him she listened to her husband rant about the various inaccuracies presented in the show. Eventually, she was unable to contain her laughter as she reached for her son’s pirate ship toy. Apparently, it had never occurred to her husband to question the stuffed toy that his son carried through the house and merely called Cap’n Jake. William had been madly in love with the cartoon since he had observed his uncle Neal watching it. He had since accrued a wealth of merchandise from the pirate themed show including an adorable toy ship.  As Emma and her son drove the ship around the living room floor Killian continued to pace,

“ It’s a bloody insult to my years as a captain! And to think my Jolly in the hands of that bastard Peter Pan! And if I….

Emma left her son happily playing with his toys to approach her husband, she reached for his hand and hook to stop the flailing and kissed him mid-sentence to stop his rambling,

“Well, then when he gets older you can tell him all about the inexactitudes of the Disney corporation just like we’ll have to explain that his grandmother would never own such an… interesting dress and that she can’t actually talk to animals welcome to 21st-century pirate, it's rife with untruths…”

With that Killian inhaled deeply and returned his wife’s kiss and sat on the couch as she cuddled next to him while they watched their son force the Captain Hook figure off the side of the Jolly Roger.

“I’d never be outwitted by a ten-year-old" muttered the pirate indignantly 


End file.
